Earlier this year I watched a graduation speech given by an author I like, George Saunders. Typically I’m not one for these kinds of inspirational messages but I thought I would give it a go.

In the speech, George talks to a bunch of graduates from an elite college in America about the importance of kindness. The following quote has stuck with me:

What I regret most in my life are failures of kindness. Those moments when another human being was there, in front of me, suffering, and I responded sensibly. Reservedly. Mildly.

Two years ago I wrote about a woman called Shirley. She is a farmer from the Aurora Province in the Philippines. I’ll never forget her.

Shirley in 2013

Shirley’s parents weren’t able to afford to send her to school. She grew up in pretty severe poverty, the kind where she didn’t know where the next meal was coming from.

Shirley used a small loan to start a farm that has been relatively successful. She has money to afford things like safe shelter and food but wasn’t able to have children.

And here is what I’ll never forget about Shirley. With the money she earns from the farm she has paid for children from poorer families in her community to go to school and even college – giving them an opportunity she couldn’t have.

Now Shirley’s farm has been successful but as I’m sure any parent will appreciate, providing seven children with a full education isn’t cheap.

Shirley wasn’t on our list of mothers to meet but I asked if we could stop by and see her. She’s someone that has been on my mind for a long time and it meant a lot to me to be able to tell her that.

We pulled up to her house and she came to the gate. It’s the most emotionally overwhelmed I’ve been on the trip so far. I said hello and shook her hand and she let us into her home, which also serves as a meeting centre for women in her local community.

I told her that I had written about her two years ago and almost been in tears. I took a photo with her, which I won’t share because she looks slightly uncomfortable with the level of admiration I’m emitting. To be honest I think she was a little unsure of why I was grinning from ear to ear, struggling to find words.

Shirley in 2015

The two of us walked around her house and she showed me stuff like her little plot of eggplants she’s growing and her dogs. I tried to tell her how amazing what she is doing is and she responded in a way that pretty much said, "it is what it is."

But for me it isn’t just "it is what it is." What I admire so strongly about Shirley is her response to what she saw. At the cost of her own wellbeing she responded, not mildly or reservedly but with wholehearted conviction. The kind of conviction that has had a huge impact on the lives of others.

To me, Shirley is kindness and that is pretty dang important.

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